They can neither read the clock nor the bus timetable. On the other hand, children are braver and more creative than we “big ones” and are masters at delegating and making contacts. Because they approach others curiously and without prejudice. They live in the
here and now, do not quarrel with the past and do not think about the future. In short: If we could keep the exuberant energy of a child for a lifetime, we would be happier, healthier, more relaxed and more successful. Or?
Table of Contents
It can be a bit childish
Nearly. We also need a sense of reality and seriousness. Just imagine your boss covering his eyes with his hands for a raise because he thinks he’s going to become invisible. The fact that we no longer behave like preschool children when it comes to social behavior and everyday knowledge undoubtedly makes life easier for us. So the goal is to stay adult and recapture some childhood strengths. We took a closer look at the 17 most wonderful for you and asked experts what we can easily learn from the little ones.
See the world from different eyes
1. Children are happy
Children laugh about 400 times a day, adults only 15 times. As a result, children are simply in a better mood, but also more optimistic, self-confident and even healthier. Prof. Michaela Axt-Gadermann reveals how you can increase your amount of laughter (book tip: “What makes children smart and happy”, Herbig, 150 pages, 17.99 euros): “Consciously let yourself be infected by laughter. Watch more comedy in the future and surround yourself with people who see the lighter side of life. That rubs off.”
Laughter makes you healthy
And because even “fake” laughter makes you healthy and happy, there are now a good 150 “laughing clubs” in Germany (information: www.lachclub.info or Tel. 0 69/5 96 39 11). Would you rather go to the basement to laugh? Then next time take a comfortable mat with you! Laughter or Hasya Yoga will systematically bring you out of your gloom.
2. Children empathize
While playing, children learn to slip into other roles. If a girl then cries on the playground because she can’t find her mother, another child can easily put herself in the situation and almost feels the fear on her own body. It will try to comfort the girl.
What can you see? The motto in life: “Do not do to others what you do not want done to yourself.” Would it offend you if you knew that your colleagues were badmouthing you behind your back? Allegedly. Then stay out of the rounds of gossip in the future.
3. Children can listen
“Aha. So so. Mhhh.” – We have learned that affirmative sounds are enough to pass as a good listener. But only those who are really careful can ask questions. They signal interest and sharpen the ear for important messages between the lines. Tip: Summarize what the other person said and ask if you understood it correctly.
Rediscover life
4. Children marvel
We rarely see adults who open their eyes and mouths in awe. Serenity is wrongly equated with sophistication. Prof. Anton Bucher: “People who are only enlightened are not clever, they are precocious. Very educated people in particular – scientists, for example – can still be amazed. Truly educated people are enthusiastic people.”
How can children help us? “Just because we get involved in their questions and also question the obvious.” A US study shows that reverence has a long-term effect. “It gives us the feeling that we have more time, makes us more patient and helpful,” says Melanie Rudd from the University of Minnesota. “We make smarter decisions and feel happier.” Amazing.
5. Children observe closely
Do butterflies have hair ? How far does a dandelion seed fly? A child can certainly answer these questions for you. And not only that. It observes the behavior and mood of its fellow human beings just as closely. If it doesn’t understand something, it asks: “Why are you crying?” – “Why did you say shit?” Definitely a quality that also helps adults: to develop more empathy. We never stop learning on this point! Anyone who observes closely and follows up directly avoids misunderstandings, insults and weeks of radio silence.
6. Children react at ease
We adults immediately notice the new dark-skinned boy in the day care center. Immediately we ask ourselves: Does he speak German? Children don’t care. They just shrug their shoulders in disbelief when we ask them if they notice anything about the boy. Any other child – without exception – could become a friend at first.
Approaching other people at ease
“Children are completely free to approach other children and simply see them as potential playmates,” says Prof. Axt-Gadermann. “If the other person doesn’t feel like playing, the child doesn’t blame themselves, but simply says: ‘She (or he) is stupid.'” Adults, on the other hand, assume that (almost) every rejection is their fault must lie personally – i.e. they are not interesting enough – and thus stand in their own way. Why not just bravely try a second time? And if the other person still shows no interest – well, he must be pretty stupid!
Arouse curiosity
7. Children don’t hold grudges
A quarrel among children? Often violent. Suddenly it says: “Everyone against Leon!” But as quickly as the conflict breaks out, it subsides again. And Leon doesn’t have to fear that the “old story” will boil up again. It’s different for us adults: “Whether we react resentfully depends on whether we blame the person in question or whether we try to understand the situation in which the other person behaved in a way that offended us,” explains Prof. Books. In other words, we only have the right to correct someone after we have tried to understand them.
8. Children are (mostly) honest
Researchers at the University of Massachusetts/USA found out: In a 10-minute small talk, an adult lies an average of 2.9 times. “If we were completely honest for a week, we would probably be rid of partners, friends and jobs,” says Prof. Axt-Gadermann. “It’s sensible not to say everything that’s on the tip of your tongue. Honesty counts when it can keep those we love out of trouble. In a partnership, too, it is important to address disruptive things openly so that they do not build up – but not as a reproach, but in a diplomatic, appreciative manner. Unfortunately, children can’t do that yet.”
9. Children are curious
Whether they’re driving us to the brink with tricky questions or exploring a simple cardboard box, kids love to get to the bottom of things. At the same time, they learn and grasp increasingly complex relationships. It is a pity that this interest is declining among adults. A portion of curiosity has the effect of boosting your career.
Tip: First, try to get rid of the misconception that asking a question is tantamount to ignorance or even incompetence.
On the contrary: A keen interest in new things and the questioning of commonplaces often lead to new possibilities and perspectives. This not only scores points in your job, but also in your private life.
10. Children are carefree
Life will never feel so wonderfully simple again. But “the way to a happier life is easy,” encourages Prof. Axt-Gadermann. “Each evening, write down three things that you experienced positively during the day. In this way you collect numerous impressions that will make your life happier.” You should also regularly check how serious your problems really are. “For example,” says Axt-Gadermann, “by asking yourself: How much importance will I attach to my colleague’s pointed remark in four weeks?
We usually find that banalities rob us of our light-heartedness. Live more consciously in the here and now, don’t seek your happiness in the future.”
Be brave like a child
11. Children make us shine
Your mission for the next supermarket visit: smile – like many children do – at everyone who crosses your path. Prof. Axt-Gadermann: “Most of them will smile back spontaneously.” Why? This is what Sophie Scott from University College London discovered: Our brain reflects positive emotions particularly strongly. This puts you in a good mood and gives you a boost in self-confidence – both for you and for that of your counterpart.
12. Children don’t know time
Children often forget everything around them. What remains is the memory of a feeling of absolute happiness. Do you want that too? “You have to do something that you enjoy doing. The requirement must be so high that it requires our full concentration, but at the same time it must not overwhelm us,” explains Prof. Axt-Gadermann.
That means: Forget multitasking, i.e. the (too) often praised gift of being able to handle several tasks at the same time. This leads to stress and mediocrity. If you want to do something particularly well, focus exclusively on it for at least a day. First, write down all the terms that come to your mind. Search for compounds and sub-terms. In the end, there is a result peppered with creative ideas and thoughts. And your task brought you so much fun that you completely forgot about the time.
13. Children are selfish
Children delegate resolutely and without a guilty conscience: “Go ahead and do it (close your shoes, open the package of biscuits, etc.).” They accept gifts without “compulsion to reply” in their heads and are not ashamed to be happy about success, progress and praise. How you manage to do this (again), says Prof. Axt-Gadermann: “Resist the urge, if your dress is praised, to answer: ‘Oh, that’s old.’ Instead, say thank you and say, ‘Yeah, I like it, too.’ This is how you train yourself to accept and enjoy praise.” And: Praise yourself!
Be happy for others
Prof. Anton Bucher (book tip: “Psychology of Happiness, Beltz, 288 pages, 32.95 euros): “Anyone who is happy about the success of others and also shows this increases the likelihood that others will react just as positively if we ourselves To be successful. This creates a mutual culture of confirmation and recognition that can be incredibly motivating.”
14. Children are brave
Of course you shouldn’t jump off the nearest garage roof with a pair of homemade paper wings, but you can take a little more risk in life.
Strategy #1: Write down what you dream about and why. What are you hoping for? What prevents you from taking the fulfillment of your dream into your own hands? Do the positive aspects outweigh it? Get going!
Strategy #2: Put yourself in a situation from your childhood that required courage. For example climbing the tallest tree in the garden. Yes, you were afraid of falling off. But remember that feeling when you reached the crown? The pride, the relief? The wind that blew through the branches? Keep that in mind the next time you hesitate.
Be more confident in life
15. Money doesn’t matter
Children don’t care about the material value of an item. The proof: Try swapping out the one-eyed teddy bear or the holey comforter for a brand new toy. You will rebuff. A child sticks to the things that have made them happy in the past, no matter how old or shabby they may seem to others. As adults, of course, we cannot completely escape the external (social) pressures surrounding material possessions. It’s also a nice feeling to be able to afford something. But: Those who regularly remind themselves of what is really important to them straighten their understanding of values. It makes you happier and more balanced.
16. Don’t be afraid to fail
If children gave up trying to learn something new like some adults do, they would remain in the infant state forever. An unbridled will to succeed isTolfioow to their survival. Before a child takes their first steps, they fall on their face 300 times on average. It may bitch or cry or whine, but it never gives up. On the contrary: It learns from its mistakes and does not allow itself to be discouraged. You can too!
Visualize your success and imagine the feeling you will feel when you have cleared all the hurdles. Euphoria, pride and happiness would be worth at least a second and third try, right? If you still have doubts: Write a list of all the things you have already achieved in your life – this will boost your self-confidence and will definitely help the next time you try it.
17. Children are creative
A child plays a good 15,000 hours by the age of six. That means seven to eight hours of pure creativity every day. The older we get, the more other activities crowd out play. A number of studies have already shown what a loss this means. For example, Finnish scientists let 40 seniors regularly climb, slide, seesaw or balance on a special playground over a period of 3 months.
The result: speed and coordination improved significantly, and the study participants had a lot of fun. In the meantime, the toy industry has reacted to this trend and is launching its own product lines for so-called “kidults” (a mix of the English words “kid” for child and “adults” for adults); in Germany, a good 20 percent of toys are now bought by adults for adults. “A good start,” says educator Dr. Udo Baer. “Playing is fun, brings contacts, awakens creativity and opens up the world to us.”
