That idiot! The road is wide enough!” Such a curse is liberating – and a bit disconcerting when we are alone in the car. A similarly queasy feeling arises when we hear ourselves murmuring in front of the computer: “How was that again? First click on the switch with the mouse and then …” Consequences of being single? Age-related oddness? First signs of “roof damage”? no way.
Talking to yourself is completely normal. “What we all perceive as who we are is essentially a fairy tale our brain tells itself,” said Prof. Michael Gazzaniga, director of the SAGE Center for Neuroscience in Santa Barbara, USA. In other words: without self-talk, there is no self-confidence.
Usually it happens in the quiet little room. In front of others, the soliloquy usually falls silent to an inner monologue. Plato already regarded thinking as “the soul talking to itself”. Writer Oscar Wilde did not only appreciate first-person dialogues to clarify his texts. “I like to hear myself talk,” he admitted frankly. “It’s one of my greatest pleasures.” In such a prominent company, we don’t have to be embarrassed anymore.
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Self-talk helps to tap potential
Additional backing has recently come from research: New US studies show that 96 out of 100 adults regularly speak audibly to themselves . In view of such numbers, not only Prof. Dolores Albarracin , a psychologist at the University of Illinois in the USA, is convinced: “Talking to oneself is one of the most important tools we use to control our behavior.”
Four areas of application have now been identified: Self-criticism (“The I should have done differently”), self -management (“I mustn’t forget to put gas in the car”), self-affirmation (“Well done”) and evaluating social situations(“Think carefully about what you want to say to the teacher afterwards”). Children seem to know all this intuitively. Thinking out loud is natural for three to five year olds. For example, when they solve a tricky task (e.g. tying their shoes) or classify experiences of the day before going to bed. The dialogue with themselves helps them to focus their own attention. Distractions and background noise are faded out. He makes her inner world come alive. “Three-year-olds who talk to themselves can reach the problem-solving level of four-year-olds who don’t talk to themselves,” says Dr. Adam Winsler, developmental psychologist at George Mason University in Fairfax, USA. His message to parents, educators and teachers is therefore clear: “Let them talk – it helps. Children need to talk to themselves
OK. But 30 or 40 years later in the office or when assembling the new shelf, it still seems silly. Isn’t it enough to think about it in silence? No! “Self-talk also confirms adults what they know inside,” emphasizes Dr. Dirk Wedekind, Senior Physician at the Clinic for Psychiatry and Psychotherapy at the University of Göttingen.
Diffuse thoughts suddenly become extremely clear
Putting your thoughts into words takes longer than silent thinking; but when we talk to ourselves aloud, we become more aware of what’s going through our heads. We get straight to the point. “Thoughts are mostly diffuse, unstructured. It is often only when you say it that you get clarity,” says Wedekind. The chaotic tangle of thoughts unraveled. Best example: learning vocabulary. Comparative studies show that subjects who pronounce new words aloud while cramming do better on the vocabulary test afterwards.
Apparently, the “ egolog ” not only brings more clarity, it also increases activity and the formation of connections in the brain.
Researchers from the Universities of Bamberg and Vienna gave test subjects a construction task and observed them on video. Previously, they were explicitly invited to think out loud. What happened? The best drafts came from those who had spoken particularly intensely to themselves. But the experiment also showed impressively: It all depends on how. The most successful were those test subjects who asked themselves groundbreaking questions out loud (“If I screw it on like this, will it hold?”). On the other hand, derogatory self-statements such as “man, am I stupid!” did not help creativity.
“One should concentrate on the matter when talking to oneself, remain solution-oriented and protect one’s ego instead of tearing it apart unnecessarily,” advise Prof. Dietrich Dörner and Dr. Ralph Reimann, the authors of the study. Junior professor Ibrahim Senay , a psychologist at Turkey’s Zirve University, can only agree. “Open-ended questions also increase motivation,” he adds. In tricky language tests, his test subjects did best when they first asked themselves out loud: “Can I do it?” It’s not a problem at all”. “Encouraging yourself in this way creates pressure rather than motivation,” concludes Senay.
Athletes should practice talking to themselves regularly
In sports, where talking to oneself is practically de rigueur, things are more complicated. When it comes to strength and endurance, an energetic “Give it your all!” can actually spur you on to top performance. If rather complex sequences of movements have to be mastered, such cheering on the other hand fizzles out. Then clear instructions (“arms up!”) are better. “The most important thing is to practice talking to yourself regularly,” says assistant professor Antonis Hatzigeorgiadis, a sports psychologist at the University of Thessaloniki.
Tennis pro Tommy Haas did that. “I’m fed up. Who am I doing all this shit for but me?” he cursed loudly in the 2007 Australian Open quarterfinals. “You’re a complete idiot, but you win the match. Fighte!” In the end he defeated the Russian Nikolai Davidenko 6:3, 2:6, 1:6, 6:1 and 7:5. So even if only one person is listening to us, it can unleash enormous power.
Harnessing the powers of self-talk
Duden for the next soliloquy
“Anyone can make self-talk a habit,” encourages Dr. Ralph Reimann from the University of Vienna. But it depends on the how. If you follow a few simple rules, you can boost your creativity, increase your performance and solve problems faster and better.
- Questions that look for the effects of one’s own actions help when learning or solving difficult tasks, for example: “If I do it like this, what will happen then?” ●
- If you want to put a good intention into action (e.g. do more sport, eat a balanced diet), you should regularly ask yourself open questions, e.g. E.g.: “Am I going to do this?”, “Am I going to pull this off?”, “How do I feel about doing this?”
- Don’t just compliment other people. Your ego is also happy about positive – and audible! – Self-reinforcement (“Well done!”) with small everyday successes.
- If you want to help your memory in everyday life, you should interview it: “What did I want to do now?”, “I need coffee and what else?” or “How was that again?”
- When you lose, it’s better not to say: “I’ll never manage that.” That demotivates. Look ahead with optimism: “Next time, I’ll try this and that.”
Self Talk: This is how he gets you further
Our first and next conversation partner – we are ourselves. Reason enough to keep him happy, to take care of him and to get the best out of the dialogue with him. Sound crazy? It’s not at all! Self-talk helps us “time” ourselves. They prevent us from getting tangled up when a thousand thoughts shoot through our heads. This allows us to do one thing at a time, especially in stressful situations. Those who consult themselves regularly also have better control over their impulses. Experts speak of self-regulation in this context. We can concentrate faster and block out distractions better. If we are faced with a difficult decision, the first-person dialogue can alleviate the “agony of choice”. Because what we actually want appears much clearer when it is spoken. So: out with it! Self-talk is an outlet because positive and negative feelings can be expressed. This is good and prevents frustration from building up and causing violent overreactions at some point. Last but not least: Talking to yourself is pure motivation! Whatever plan you want to implement: formulate a catchy sentence that clearly shows you the goal. He’ll get you out of every slump in no time.
