How to Spot the Warning Signs in Toxic Relationship

No relationship is perfect and arguments are part of it. But beware when the relationship becomes toxic – how to recognize the warning signs and break out of a bad partnership.

What is a Toxic Relationship?

Toxic relationships are tricky because they are not always obvious at first glance. But what does toxic actually mean? The word “toxic” means “poisonous”, “harmful” or “malicious”. There is talk of toxic bonds when a partnership takes a lot of strength over the long term and has little to offer that is positive. In addition, the partnership is usually lived very one-sidedly and one feels inferior to the other – at the same time one idealizes this person and is emotionally dependent on them.

Affected people are afraid to separate from their partner, even if it is not good for them. Your self-confidence and self-esteem are steadily declining. Toxic relationships are characterized by frequently alternating between intense intimacy, conflict, stress, and threats of separation. Unacceptable behavior such as insults, control addiction, egotism , jealousy or social isolation from the environment are accepted.

Signs of a toxic relationship

A relationship can turn into a toxic one during the time spent together. If the partner is still loving and attentive at the beginning, his personality can change over time. This can be one reason: The dominant, oppressive partner suffers from a personality disorder characterized by a lack of empathy, an inability to criticize and a lack of self-esteem. Such narcissistic people tend to be attracted to empathetic, sensitive people who tend to blame themselves rather than rebel.

If you experience the following situations and notice the signs described in your partner, you should pay attention:

  • Conflicts escalate and your partner’s emotional state changes dramatically.
  • Your partner treats you disparagingly and is abusive towards you. He then does not apologize for this behavior.
  • You are criticized, humiliated and your partner makes you feel like you are not good enough. You are always portrayed as a scapegoat.
  • Your partner twists truths.
  • Your partner belittles their friends and family and tries to isolate you from them.
  • Your partner is always the center of attention and everything revolves around them.

How to get out of a toxic relationship

You can tell if you are in a toxic relationship if you are miserable, sad, or insecure with your partner most of the time. At the same time, you repress this and perceive your emotional state as normal. The mere thought of a breakup and being alone causes you anxiety and panic.

Ending a relationship is never easy, especially when you’re so emotionally dependent on your partner. Talk to your partner about how you feel about the relationship. Certain toxic behaviors can be treated with therapy. However, if your partner is a true narcissist, then insight becomes difficult.

Confide in friends or family, or seek professional help from a therapist yourself. Look deep within yourself and try to be radically honest with yourself: Who is your partner really? What are the problems in the relationship? Why is your partner not good for you? Regular diary writing helps to get clarity. Composing your thoughts is liberating and gives you an honest picture of how your relationship is doing. Separation is usually the right step – because don’t forget: Love alone is not enough to be able to have a happy and healthy relationship.

End and process toxic relationships

You decide against the toxic relationship and want to end it? The following tips make breaking up easier :

  • Do not take a break from a relationship, which is usually the beginning of a never-ending and unhappy on-off relationship. Draw a final line.
  • The pain of separation is always hard! But don’t indulge in perfect, past memories. In such moments, always recall the reasons that led to the breakup.
  • Don’t be afraid of being alone – even if it’s not easy at the beginning of the separation. It will get easier with time! If you feel lonely, find company and talk to friends and family.
  • So distract yourself and do what is good for you. How about going shopping with your mother or going to the cinema with your best friend?

Also interesting: Separation: go or stay? >>

Crystal Waston MD

Crystal Waston has a degree in Cross Media Production and Publishing. At vital.de she gives everyday tips and deals with topics related to women's health, sport, and nutrition.

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